Thursday, December 31, 2015

Goals for 2016

In less than an hour, it'll be 2016. Maybe, a few of you are already in 2016. But, I'm not quite there yet so I thought "Why not blog?" lol. I've always wanted to just sit down and write my goals for the upcoming New Year. I just never gotten around to doing it. Nonetheless, I'm gonna try to do it RIGHT NOW! But, "Why goals?" you may be wondering. Well, let's just say I'm not gonna expect myself to do what I'm planning to list. Nor am I going to completely ignore what I'm about to list. I just think it's better to have personal goals FOR YOURSELF. Not something people expect you to do but, things YOU personally want to achieve within 2016. So, without further ado, let's begin!

1.) Stay Fit
I PERSONALLY have struggled with staying fit. I think I personally am not getting a good amount of exercise and this is something I want to change within 2016. By this I would like to join some sort of sport SOON, and control the portions of food I eat.

2.) Be Nicer- Daily!
This is something I would really like to be better at. My friends say I'm nice but, sometimes I let this happy feeling slip away. I would like be kinder to everyone I encounter instead of being slightly sarcastic and appearing unhappy.
FUN FACT: I used to be called "Ice Princess" on SMS back in 2012 cuz I almost never smiled in pictures.
3.) Smiling More!
Gosh, I always say a smile is your best accessory but, I don't even take own advice. This past year was tough, and I'm sure 2016 is gonna be a bumpy road too. I always can't hide my emotions from my facial expressions, so I'd like to smile more. More than 50% of the time in real life I can be seen with a hard expression. (^^ Ice Princess remember?) And I'd like to let go of some of these negative vibes I get for no reason, and fill myself with positivity. Which, is gonna be really hard. But, the least I can do is smile.
4.) Become more Confident
Confidence is a huge struggle for me. But, I wanna socialize more this year and meet new people. Maybe, I'll join a club at school. Or do some sort of other activity in my community that can expose me to new people. I just want to do a better job at socializing instead of watching Korean variety shows every night shoving my face with ice cream.
5.) Learn a New Language, or Two...
I don't know about you guys, but I'm exposed to A LOT of different cultures just within my own household. And I'd like to learn Malay this year. Some of y'all may know but my mom is from Malaysia and I'd love to finally sit down and get better at Malay! I love Malay television surprisingly and I loveeee the food, so why not? And I think it's just about time I learn more about my culture. I'd also like to brush up on my Mandarin, cuz I kinda dropped outta Chinese school- so definitely need to find some sort of free outlet to that problem.
6.) Reach out to the Asian/Malaysian Fashion World
I have no idea how I'm even gonna start this but, I'd like to work with some Asian clothing/beauty websites and especially Malaysian companies to get my name out there. Or even some sort of Malaysian brand idk, I'd just like to finally get my name out there as a mixed Malaysian-American cause, there isn't a whole lot of attention on Malaysian-Americans and I hope I can take part in spreading awareness of Malaysian culture to other people.

7.) Become a Better Christian
I admit, I'm not as connected to God as I'd like to be. But, I want to change. I want to grow into being a better follower. I know I can start by paying more attention in church ( I rlly struggle with this >.<) and maybe start being more involved in my local church.
8.) Being a Better Big Sister
I've been quite a bitchy sister to my little brother. Most of the time, I can't even understand him cuz we have such different emotional values. But, things don't seem to be getting a lot better in my family, and I want to be a better sister to dongsaeng in any way I can.
9.) Be a better leader
At Chinese dance class, I'm the second oldest. But honestly, I act like I'm one of the youngest. I'm unofficially the co-captain and I suck at my job. I want to improve as a dancer to help out my juniors more cuz, some of the younger kids come to me for advice and I have no idea what to tell them. So, I want to improve more on my dance technique to help out the juniors with their technique.
10.) Give Back
I've had opportunities to volunteer, but I never take them up for some reason. I want to finally give back to my community this year in some way, shape, or form.

So yeah, these were my New Year Goals for 2016. What are yours?

Monday, December 21, 2015

Miss Universe 2015 Controversy:

I'm sure many of you were watching the Miss Universe 2015 pageant last night. My mum and I were anxiously watching to see if Miss Malaysia made it in this year- gotta root for our homeland! But, unfortunately she didn't even make it to the Top 15. :( But, everyone who did make it to the Top 15 were definitely worthy of being there.

At the very end, Miss Philippines, Miss USA, and Miss Colombia were at the Top 3. Miss USA took home 2nd runner up. And Miss Philippines and Miss Colombia were the possible candidates of becoming the next Miss Universe.

Both countries had HUGE fanbases. All throughout the show, you could hear avid fans shouting "Philippines!" or "Colombia!" And whenever each contestant got called to be in the next round you could catch glimpses of the many supporters there were for both countries.

Miss Colombia won Miss Universe 2014, and many Colombians were hoping that the glory would return to their country once again. Miss Philippines supporters were very excited when Miss Philippines made it into the Top 3. It's been over 45 years since The Philippines had won Miss Universe!

When it was time to announce the winner, host Steve Harvey announced Miss Colombia as the next Miss Universe. Meaning, Miss Philippines had won 1st Runner up. The former Miss Universe also from Colombia proudly embraced this year's Miss Colombia for her hard work. Miss Colombia was crowned and got to take her first steps as Miss Universe 2015.

However, Steve Harvey re-enters the scene. I thought he was going to ask "Miss Colombia, how does it feel to bring back another win for Colombia?" Instead, he apologizes and says he crowned the wrong girl. Miss Colombia, didn't realize what was happening. Miss Colombia still oblivious to the scene was still waving to the fans. Steve Harvey then announces that Miss Philippines was the true winner of the Miss Universe 2015 pageant.



Miss Colombia fans in shock. Miss Philippines fans and Miss Philippines herself did not know how to react. It was a very tough position to be in.

Now to be honest, I felt Miss Philippines would be a better Miss Universe than Miss Colombia. And I was shocked to hear the first outcome. The final question that was asked was, "Why should you be the next Miss Universe?" Miss Colombia gave an answer saying she had the feminine qualities that a Miss Universe should have. Miss Philippines said something along the lines with having the Miss Universe title comes great responsibility and she would take that power to address the issues present in her country.  Despite, Miss Colombia having amazing looks, (some netizens saying Miss Colombia resembles popular Colombian actress Sofia Vergara) I felt that the Philippines had better responses and is what my family calls a "good talker". And I feel Miss Universe shouldn't just have good looks but, also to be a great responder to the problems our world faces- and in my personal feeling Miss Philippines does more than fulfill those categories.

The former Miss Universe was shocked as well and had to take the crown off Miss Colombia's head and give the crown to the new Miss Universe 2015- Miss Philippines. Audience members begin to ''boo" this occurrence. And I thought "wtf are they doing?" Okay, I understand Miss Colombia fans are a bit angered that something like this could happen. And host Steve Harvey apologizes multiple times, saying he misread the card and it's a mistake on his part. Heck, he's still apologizing today. But, imagine how Miss Philippines must've been feeling during this. And the audience wasn't helping. She couldn't turn it down because, her country is counting on her. And she couldn't accept it with happiness due to this one mistake. But, I admit it must've been so sad for Miss Colombia finally reaching glory only to have it taken away. But, netizens shouldn't be hating on Steve Harvey. Mistakes happen despite how clear the card was. And netizens should definitely not be hating against Miss Philippines. She's going to make a great Miss Universe. Saying she "stole the crown." Just omfg. Both ladies are beautiful and handled the situation with grace- something I know I would've never been able to do if I were in their spots.

But, nonetheless this topic has been blowing up overnight on social media. What do you think about the controversy?
Miss Colombia and Miss Philippines: All About the 2015 Miss Universe Runner-Up and Winner| Miss Universe Pageant, TV News
Former Miss Universe Paulina Vega crowning Ariadna Gutierrez, before incident.



Actual Miss Universe 2015-  Pia Alonzo Wurtzbach

Saturday, December 19, 2015

A Letter To Myself:

Hey Naeun,
Ever since you started a new middle school back in 2014 you've been going
through a pretty tough time. It seems like everyone you know at this new school is smarter than you, 20x prettier than you, and overall more talented than you. I know you've had minor depression when you started out into this strange world called middle school- and you're unfortunately still facing it today. You watched YT videos on how to destress, and how to love yourself but, you still couldn't figure out how to do both of these things. Your entire life at this moment is school and band. And unfortunately you felt like you suck at both those things. Everyone has their extra curriculars, and you've been holding back on what you love due to family/personal issues. Dance. You love dancing. But due to your body type at this time you feel like you can't dance at all since you're not as experienced as the other girls. And mom. Mom's your best friend, but due to certain things she's not. She isn't too old, but she always says she can't drive you to the dance studio you've been dying to go to cuz it's "too far" (which is only a 20 min drive) and she's tired from her daily life.  I understand it's tiring from all the cooking, cleaning, and helping dongsaeng with his studies. But, what about me? I can't do everything on my own despite being a teen. I need help in certain areas that mom is more than capable in aiding me in. But whenever she's on her period she completely shuts down-doesn't do anything. And when you have your period, you suck it up and carry on with life. And she says with being a foreigner she just "doesn't know the answer to certain things". And this really frustrates you. Maybe by the time you read this you understand mom better. But, don't you feel like mom kinda expects you to be like her? I tried explaining to her that life is waaaayyyy more competitive now. But, she can't understand cuz she's actually nothing like you. As a kid, I admit her life did seem pretty sad with her broken family- but, she's a freaking polyglot. She can speak 5 freaking languages- languages she's not willing to teach you becuz we live in USA. And she was gorgeous. LIKE THE ANNE HATHAWAY OF MALAYSIA. Mom was the ideal image of all the mixed Chinese-Indians out there. Currently, we are at the very bottom of the "prettiness scale" in our school. And mom had tons of boyfriends, admirers, etc. And she moved to Penang, a big city in comparison to her hometown. And got an amazing job there despite having no extra curriculars, a C+ grade average, and no college education. All due to the fact that she's pretty, has a good personality, and speaks 5 languages. Us on the other hand, currently have none of those things. And it's most likely we'll never be as lucky as mom was. And no matter how much I try to tell her that being a good student isn't enough in this century, she just doesn't understand. In the past years have you talked to her about it? Did u have that day when you finally worked up the courage to just talk to mom seriously about this stuff? I've been thinking about it recently- I wonder if it'll actually happen.
 
Fortunately, at this moment you still have a tiny grasp of your dreams and you're
trying to hold on for as long as possible. By high school you're aiming to be a Straight-A student, join at least one sort of sport (hopefully dance), learn French and/or Korean, continue playing the flute, and maybe even join another activity. hahaha. I don't know if it'll happen but like I said I have big dreams for us. XD And as for college you're striving to make it into an amazing college like, Cornell, UCLA, or some college in Seoul, China, or even Japan. But all this is extremely unlikely and dad is probably sending you to the state college or something.
 
Most importantly, I hope by the time you're reading this you're finally happy. Truly happy with your life and you're no longer stressed by you're body image, grades, family, or whatever. This was extremely hard for me to write, and I don't how you'll feel when you're finally reading this but, just now I wish all the best and I love you. Naeun-ah hwaiting!
                 with love,
                                   Naeun Lee    written on: 19/12/15
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Hey guys! Umm.. a bit of a weird blog post today. Just know I did not intend this to gain sympathy or anything I just wanted to write this letter to the future version of myself to vent out my emotions, and let her/me know that I still believe in us. I'm scheduling to re-upload this blog on my birthday in 2020,  just before I head off to college. So, if you're struggling with something in your life I would highly recommend writing a letter to yourself. It really allows you to vent out your emotions and realize how you've been feeling this entire time. Of course, I'll have to return to being the happy Naeun I always am- just know there'll probably be more blogs like this.
 


                 

Monday, December 7, 2015

I Started YouTube!

Exciting announcement! I FINALLY STARTED YOUTUBE!!!

YAHOOO!!!

Thank you guys so much for your continuous support! <3 I filmed a FAQ about me video so if you'd like to watch click here. I'm so sorry for the terrible editing/lighting but, at least you get to learn a few things about me. Right? Right.